I’ve never been the kind of girl who gets fixated on her wedding day. Just to be clear, I think marriage is a wonderful way to bring a relationship together. I salute anyone who is organizing a wedding.
I can’t help but sneer at the whole thing, though. It’s not my fault that most of society adheres to the same planning process for weddings. The following are the things I refuse to do in advance of my big day because I follow my own path.
Pay attention to every last detail.
The variations among the wedding invitations I’ve ever received are something I honestly don’t understand. I typically receive five different pieces of mail in a single envelope. I don’t know how to read cursive writing, and the paper feels pricey.
One document, I promise, cost hundreds of dollars and required weeks to complete. Then, there are the seating arrangements, bouquet, flowers, linens, and table settings. (I just passed out. ).
Become the Bridezilla.
My Type A personality would not function well in the decision-making role of “bride,” as I am reasonably aware of myself. “.
At the end of the wedding planning process, I want the people I love to still feel that way. I also want to take pleasure in my engagement. When we could be binge-watching Netflix shows in our sweats, I don’t want to drudge my fiancé to cake tastings and wedding venues.
Take generic engagement pictures.
Seriously, though: Why are you staring into her eyes like that?
I don’t understand why you’re walking out of the woods away from the camera.
A dog would be nice. I want some confetti. Flannel and unbrushed curls are not what I want. People, give me something.
Throw Away Extra Showers.
Probably the most annoying aspect of weddings is this. Let alone have people watch me open presents, I don’t want to watch you unwrap presents.
Absolutely, Susan—I adore the 10-piece cake set and complementary baking pan you gave me. But I think we can all agree that there are more worthwhile activities for us to engage in than eating finger sandwiches and chit-chatting with your aunt from Virginia.
Drag People To A Ceremony That Lasts An Hour.
The wedding scene in “Love, Actually” is incredibly charming to watch. But attending a wedding in real life usually involves a lot of “awws,” butt sweat, staring at every girl’s dress, and wincing as the minister reads Corinthians 13:4.
Countdown the minutes.
I appreciate you informing me that your special day is 234 days away. It’s the equivalent of saying your child is 32 weeks old, I guess.
It is foolish. When a month has passed, please let me know.
Instead of “Our” day, make it “My” day.
I take this seriously. I’m getting married, so it’s not just about me on this day.
I have a feeling that he will find today to be just as memorable as I do. I would hate for him to have no voice at all.
I might not agree with everything he wants to include, I admit that. However, if I didn’t let him make some decisions, I’d feel self-centered.
I’m sorry I’m planning the wedding the way I am.
My dysfunctional family is no different from everyone else’s, and they have shaped how I view the whole wedding thing.
Using social media has made me uninterested in anything traditional. I might decide to run away. I might not send out 200 invitations. I won’t, however, apologise for that.
Dress for the wedding.
I won’t be wearing a cupcake on my body, really, which is all this means.
Consider It The Absolute Must-Have.
The fact of the matter is that I care far more about what happens after today than anything else. Yes, I do want my wedding day to be memorable and special.
The prelude to my actual marriage, however, is all that it is to me. Though I haven’t dreamed about my wedding day, I have dreamed about the person I will be sharing it with. I really care about that, you know.
I’ve heard so many people say that they can hardly recall their wedding days when they think back. But they do recall all the tension that had built up before them.
I apologize, but that reminds me of a nightmare.
